Dating is a chance to build something meaningful, but it works best when you set the right boundaries from the start. Setting boundaries helps you stay focused on what really matters. After all, God wants the best for you — and healthy boundaries honor Him, yourself, and the person you’re dating. Here are seven boundaries for Christians to think about incorporating into your dating life.
1. Physical Boundaries
Physical attraction is a good thing, but it’s important to set limits in regard to physical intimacy. Decide ahead of time how far is too far. Paul reminds us in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit. Respecting your body and theirs shows love and self-control. Talk with your partner about this early in your relationship so you’re on the same page.
2. Spiritual Boundaries
Faith is the foundation of a Christian relationship. Are you praying together? Are you going to church together? These are great ways to grow in faith! But also be careful not to make your entire spiritual life about your partner or start to idolize marriage. Keep your connection with God personal. Matthew 6:33 says to "seek first the Kingdom of God," so keep Him at the center.
3. Time Boundaries
Balance is key. Spending every moment with your partner might seem sweet, but it can lead to neglecting other priorities. Make time for family, friends, and other responsibilities. Set limits on how much time you spend together, whether it’s in person or texting all day. Setting a timer might even help!
4. Space Boundaries
You don’t have to share every thought, feeling, or experience right away. It’s okay to hold some things close until the relationship grows deeper. Proverbs 4:23 says, "Guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Take your time opening up and respect their pace, too.
5. Social Boundaries
Set boundaries for how much of your relationship you share with others. Do you really need to post every date on Instagram? Share enough to be respectful, but keep personal moments between the two of you. Not everyone needs a backstage pass to your relationship.
6. Financial Boundaries
Money can create pressure in dating. Be clear about who pays for what, and avoid spending beyond your means. Learning to honor God with your resources (Proverbs 3:9) starts now. Generosity is great, but don’t get into debt trying to impress. (If the relationship gets more serious, you’ll want to be sure to have the money talk!)
7. Emotional Boundaries
It’s easy to get so wrapped up that you lose yourself while dating. Keep hobbies and friendships outside of your relationship. Lean on God first for your emotional needs. Remember, you’re not meant to replace Jesus for each other.
When you set healthy boundaries, you give your relationship the chance to grow in a way that honors both God and each other.
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