Beyond Abstinence: What Does Purity Mean in a Christian Relationship?

When we think about “purity” in a relationship, we typically think of not having sex before marriage. But remaining abstinent isn’t the only way to remain pure. Keep reading to learn what purity really means in a Christian relationship and how to practice purity that honors God. 

1. Purity of Heart

First, purity in a Christian relationship extends beyond physical boundaries to the heart. It's about having pure intentions toward your partner. This means loving them with an unselfish, genuine love, as described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. 

If you're dating someone just because you're lonely or want to fit in with your friends who are in relationships, then your motives aren't pure. However, if you're with them because you genuinely care for them and see a future with them, that is a pure intention.

2. Purity of Mind

Purity also involves our thoughts. Philippians 4:8 instructs us to think about things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy. Instead of fantasizing about physical intimacy, focus your thoughts on how you can build a deeper connection with your partner, emotionally and spiritually.

3. Purity in Actions

Our actions should also reflect purity. This doesn't just refer to abstaining from sexual intimacy but also treating each other with kindness and respect. You can show respect by honoring your partner's boundaries, not hiding things or telling half-truths, or simple acts like expressing gratitude for the things they do.

4. Purity in Communication

The words we speak play a crucial role in maintaining purity. Ephesians 4:29 says, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." This could mean avoiding gossip, crude jokes, or derogatory comments. Instead, strive to speak words of encouragement, love, and truth to each other.

5. Purity in Spirituality

Finally, purity in a Christian relationship means helping each other grow spiritually. You can pray, study the Bible, or serve in ministry together. These activities not only help you grow individually but also strengthen your relationship.

While abstaining from sex before marriage is biblical, Christian purity doesn’t stop there. It encompasses our heart, mind, actions, words, and spirituality. By striving for purity in all these areas, we can honor God with our relationships!